We've been having some rough times with A recently. His meltdowns have increased. Some days we start the day with them, some days that just increase in the afternoons, but they're happening a lot. On top of that, he's developed yet another of his fears. You and I know they're irrational, but they make perfect sense to him. Most of his fears seem to revolve around noises that have startled him. Once something gets him startled, the fear seems to encompass more and more. A couple weeks ago, DH was straightening up and accidentally unplugged the tv/TiVo. When it turned back on the TiVo made a noise that startled him, so now he's terrified that the TiVo might make that noise again. When we arrive home after being out, he often comes out of the car with his hands on his ears, looking through the window to make sure the TiVo light is still on, just to be sure. It has now escalated to him flipping out yesterday when Daddy came home since he now has associated DH with causing the TiVo to make that scary sound. ARGH!!!
Today I took the kids to a program at the library. They were so well behaved. I reminded A of the rules as soon as we sat down (mainly that he can't make comments and ask me questions in his regular speaking voice during the show) and he remembered them most of the time. They had a lot of fun. At the end of the program a man dressed as Santa came and the kids wanted to talk to him (O--kay?) so we waited in line with the rest of the kids. The boy in front of had two women with him - one was probably his mom, the other his TSS. The TSS had a binder filled with PECS cards and they were trying to get him to point to the appropriate cards so he could tell Santa that he would like a reward please. The boy was cheerful and happy and thrilled to receive his reward from Santa. And he was completely non-verbal.
When the boys were younger and I was feeling overwhelmed with the day-to-day dealings of raising infant twins, I would somtimes watch shows on families with higher-order multiples and would always walk away feeling better, thinking if they can do it with however many kids they're attempting to raise, surely I can raise my two (and then three).
A is challenging. But he can tell me what is bothering him, what is causing the meltdowns, why he's screaming (eventually). He can tell me he loves me (even if it's twenty times or more a day). I know there are kids out there who can't, whose moms would do anything just to hear those words. And today I needed to be reminded of how good I have it.